Thursday, May 27, 2010

Musings on Manners..

I don't claim to be perfect. Truly, I don't. I know I am far from it. I also don't claim to be any sort of expert on formal manners, nor a historian on the matter.What I do know, however, is that it thoroughly pisses me off when people show a blatant disregard for etiquette and social graces. And honestly, it vexes me even more when people are clueless about what they are doing. At least you can call someone who is aware of their bad behaviour an asshole. What do you call people who do rude things without knowing that it's rude? Can there be such an instance? I think so. And it's baffling! All you want to do is call them stupid, but is that a fair judgment?

Just last night going home a couple were sitting right at the back of the bus. It was a fairly full bus - there were no empty rows left (you had to sit next to someone), except for one two-seater row right in front of the couple. As I moved to the back of the bus, heading towards the empty row, I realized there was a reason nobody had sat there. The couple had placed their two shopping bags on the seats. SHOPPING BAGS. They made no signs of moving the bags as people approached and I was forced to squish beside them while their bags got a roomy and comfortable trip home.

Now, these people were clearly a clueless example. They did not seem to notice that they were doing anything wrong.

This brings me to my question of the day. The couple were some kind of Eastern European (Polish, I think.) Now, I'm Eastern European myself, and though not Polish, I've been to Poland.. and bus etiquette did not exist when I was there! Could it be minor culture clash? But, is this an excuse? Just because your action may be acceptable somewhere else, does that make it acceptable here when many would consider it rude? Or am I forced to adjust what I consider bad etiquette? Am I too sensitive? Get pissed off too easily? Probably. But are the manners that I learned growing up not relevant or viable anymore?

Are social graces and good manners an archaic thought these days? Something to think about.


DISCLAIMER:
Of course I do rude things! I break the rules of good manners more than I should.. and I am definitely one of those assholes who know that they are doing it!

Here are some of my most frequent etiquette sins:
1. I ALWAYS listen to my iPod too loud on the subway. EVERY time (I do, however, turn it down if asked.)
2. I gossip more than I should.
3. I am a very loud drunk. Especially on my way home.
4. I check my Blackberry in places I shouldn't.
5. I flip people off and swear at stupid people while in the car. And I don't even drive. (No doubt I will share some instances with you later on.)

Obviously I could go on, but I won't. I have to keep some face, don't I?

4 comments:

  1. 6. You don't answer me on facebook!

    But anyway, this blog has potential. All this bitterness is getting me all tingly on the inside. Just ask me if you need tips on topics to rave about - I have plenty!

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  2. Oh yes bus etiquette is huge... like those people who smack you with their backpacks- so irritating.

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  3. I can totally relate...think, three person family standing in a horizontal line blocking the entire bus isle with lots of people squished behind them, and tons of room in front of them. *Shakes fist* so frustrating!

    I'm looking forward to future posts! It was very entertaining to read :)
    -Katrina

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  4. The problem with Canadian's is we're too polite to explain our cultural etiquette. Instead we choose to boil with anger and pass judgement. If someone had just kindly said "can I sit there please" I believe the bags would have been moved. Instead our polite society is wasting engergy both standing and internally griping. Our engery could be better used teaching. European culture will ask or tell you exactly what's on their mind. It seems aggressive but if we stopped being so sensitive and told people what we thought energy would be saved.

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